The Urban Grind

Via Clashdaily.com

The State is my shepherd,
I shall not want.
It makes me lie down in federally owned pastures.
It leads me beside quiet waters in banned fishing areas.
It restores my soul through its control.
It guides me in the path of dependency for its namesake.
Even though our nation plunges into the valley of the shadow of debt,
I will fear no evil,
For Barack will be with me.
The Affordable Care Act and food stamps,
They comfort me.
You prepare a table of Michelle Obama approved foods before me in the presence of my Conservative and Libertarian enemies.
You anoint my head with hemp oil;
My government regulated 16-ounce cup overflows.
Surely mediocrity and an entitlement mentality will follow me
All the days of my life,
And I will dwell in a low-rent HUD home forever and ever.
Amen.

Hat tip: The Minority Report

Hat tip: Eva from Facebook

This morning, the Muslim Brotherhood warned the United States that if the United States continued meddling in Egypt, Libya, and other potential hot spots in the Middle East, they intend to cut off America’s supply of 7-11 and Motel 6 managers.

If this action does not yield sufficient results, cab drivers will be next, followed by Dell, AT&T, and AOL customer service reps.

Finally, if all else fails, they have threatened not to send us any more presidents either. It’s gonna get ugly, people.

Hat tip: Ron L. Via Facebook

Via Facebook

In this case, it’s a cute dog. But if Obama is re-elected, I can honestly imagine something like this happening to the dog’s owner.

Via commenter StreekyD at CNN.com

Obama is my shepherd; I shall not work.
He keepth jobs out of the hands of the people,
Which leadeth the country to class warfare and polarization.
He encourageth sloth; he leadeth the government to new heights in deficit spending.
Yea, though I walk in the shadow of Economic collapse,
I shall fear no depression: for Obama is with me.
His handouts and monetary indiscretion supplement my income.
He maintainest spending increases in the presence of insurmountable debt;
He punisheth businesses with excessive regulations;
And giveth the hard-earned fruits of labor to the unproductive.
Surely, handouts and stimulus payments shall follow all the days of his administration;
And I will stay unemployed forever.

I’m actually surprised SNL would ever air such a politically incorrect skit. I have the feeling it won’t be online for long.

The first video is a repeat from last year. But this time there’s a second part. Both are funny.

Via Nicholas Stix Uncensored

By Nicholas Stix

When Mayor Bloomberg’s police came for the moldy, torn, used books, I was silent, for I was not a moldy, torn, used book.

When they came for the filthy, used, fast-food containers,
I was silent, for I was not a filthy, used, fast-food container.

When they came for the smelly, old boots, I was silent, for I was not a smelly, old boot.

When they came for the abandoned tarpaulins, I was silent, for I was not an abandoned tarpaulin.

When they came for the leftover leaflets, I was silent, for I was not a leftover leaflet.

When they came for me, there was no more garbage left
that could protest.